POVERTY
November 01, 2021
Prayer: Jesus I want to clean and move my expectations and those of others out of my soul today. I give You the key to my spiritual house, and I invite You in. Amen
Scripture: Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. Matt. 5:3 NIV
My spirit at school is so full of ME — my expectations. It is also filled to overflowing with the expectations of OTHERS — state and federal officials, district and campus administrators, parents, students, and co-workers. Around all these things, I have crammed into my soul the expectations of my spouse, children and those in the community church.
I am an expectations hoarder. I realize there is little room or time for Jesus in my life, most especially where I work. There is no place for His expectations except on Sunday mornings. I stuff a little Jesus in around the edges of my life where people can see Him and I falsely make believe I am a faith-filled person. He no longer dwells in my heart. He once lived there when my life was so much simpler, when I had so much less responsibility in the different areas of my life, before I had a family and became an educator. This hurts. I find myself in poverty in my relationship with Jesus, the relationship which should be the richest in my life.
Today I begin spiritual house cleaning. I first toss out of my soul my most coveted, socially accepted, and rewarding idol, the desire to please others and myself before pleasing God. Next, I find and toss out any and all repressed anger and bitterness I have held toward myself and others because of my unmet expectations. I toss out of my soul the petty jealousies I have secretly collected and held toward others at work, in my family and in the church. I clean off and throw away the shelf full of the most popular judgements I like to pick up and pass upon myself and others.
I throw out all the anxieties which litter the floor that I have tripped and fallen upon so many times. I set outside my soul’s door all the worries about lesson plans, grading papers, administrative mandates, professional advancement, parental complaints, student behaviors, personal family issues, and church squabbles. I look under the bed in my soul and find pride and my personal dreams hiding there. These two things are the hardest for me to throw away.
I get on my hands and knees and begin scrubbing all the stains this trash has left on the floor and walls. For solvent I use the spiritual tears falling from my eyes as I realize the many years, months, days, hours, and minutes my soul has been so filled with these things that there has been no room left for Jesus, especially in my professional life.
Today I am truly poor in spirit; my soul is bare. I step outside myself. My heart is no longer my home. I hand the key to the door of my spirit to Jesus. I have nothing left inside to call my own. There has been an eviction because of the conviction of the Holy Spirit. I tell Jesus, “You are the Master of this house, not me.” He accepts the key and enters in.
As I wait outside the door of my soul, Jesus begins furnishing my soul with genuine trust and love for Him and unconditional love for ALL, even myself and those that don’t meet my expectations. He builds a new shelf and places books full of truth and wisdom upon it. He fills the clothes closet with humility and in the dresser he places courage, praise, thanksgiving, and confession. Under the bed He hides His plans and dreams for me. He fills the bathtub with tears of joy. He scatters flower petals, made from the peace that passes all understanding, all across the floor.
He comes to the door of my soul where I am standing and opens it. He lifts me up in His strong carpenter’s arms and carries me over the threshold while in my ear He whispers, “Welcome home my bride, my beloved. Welcome home.”
Reflection: Am I an expectations hoarder? Is confession to God a discipline in my life? Should it be?
Getting Real: Confess to God what is in your life that needs to go. Ask Him to fill you with the
opposite of these things. Wait patiently for Him. Remodeling is often not done quickly.
Copyright Don Clark. To connect with the author, email [email protected]
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Thank you for the reminder. It was a beautiful picture.
I’m a first year teacher in a new community and I feel those expectations every day. The past couple of weeks have been hard and at the end of last week I could feel the spiritual emptiness. The devo today just reinforced the concept.
Thank you and God bless!
Well said. Thank you.